Now bear with me a minute because I’m not very good at this stuff. I will word this as simply as I know how. In scenario form.

Me: Good Morning, I’d like to make a claim on my insurance.
Them: Certainly, Sir. But before you do, you have to pay us some of the money you are going to claim.
Me: But I already pay. Every month. No Fair!
Them: Of course it’s fucking fair, Sir. We are an insurance company, would we screw you over?
Me: Well, I’m beginning to wonder. So can you break down all this payment business for me?
Them: Of course we can sir, you stupid bastard. You pay us each month – a smidgen of it being admin fees – in the hope that by the time you claim you have already covered what we will shell out for. Then just so we don’t lose out on anything, we take a little bit of the money we will supposedly ‘give’ BACK to you. It’s called excess. It’s worded like we both win, but actually we win. You may as well not have insurance and just keep a box of money under your bed and hope that too doesn’t get stolen with the rest of your shit. I can tell you this now as you’ve already paid us enough money to make it worth while. Is there anything else I can help you with today, Sir?
Me: Erm…
Them: No? Good, thank you for your call. It is important to us. You cock.

Fair assumption of ‘interest’? Please englighten me if I have a missed a crucial point.

Much love Tx


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