Today on the crowded train I was eating a yoghurt. A petit felous as I know you wondering. Strawberry. It wasn’t bad actually, thanks for asking. No you can’t, buy your own, fuck off.
Now that made you feel slightly irritated with me didn’t it? Made you want to maybe insert the empty pot slowly, but forcefully into a certain oraphis of mine.
Well think how the guy felt next to me who was pissed off and covered in snow, when I got a big dollop of felous down his suit trousers. As it dropped we both watched it, then looked at each slowly. He didn’t say a thing. And I made it worse. I fairly quickly and accurately scooped it off his knee with my spoon and apologized quietly, bowing my head in shame for the rest of the journey. I don’t know why, but I licked the spoon afterwards.