‘Drive-by Bastard’

You know that saying that goes something along the lines of it’s funny until it happens to you. I think I’ve been hit with a heavy dollop of karma.

When I was about ten, I remember everytime I was in the car with my Dad after it rained I would urge him strongly to drive close to the path so we could drench padestrians with puddles. A ‘Drive-by Bastard’ as we called it. Whilst my face lit up with an equal mixture of glee, content and mild sadistic anger, people walking on the adjacent path would be drenched from head to toe, and throroughly pissed off. How we laughed.

Walking back along the appropriately named ‘Cold Bath Street’ today, I noticed in my daydreaming that there were a number of huge deep puddles, that were filling even still because of the terrentual rain. A big Audi approached, and once it was a hundred yards away I could see it speeding up and veering slightly toward the pavement. I knew what was coming. I could see the same psychotic, open mouthed laughing in the two young guys in the car that I posessed. I stopped and braced myself. Yep. I was Niagara-d.

The bow wave that hit me was high and strong leaving no inch of my body dry, even my pants were soaked through. My cigarettes were sodden, my wallet sagging and I had to shake the water out of my ears for a few minutes. They even left the windows open so I could hear the bellowing laughter fade down the road. You cunts. I lifted my middle finger to try and regain some dignity, but upon doing this I realised that half my shopping had fallen to my feet. Karma can really be a whore.

Much Love

Thom -x-


One thought on “‘Drive-by Bastard’

  1. ahahaha serves you right! shame about the wallet and shopping though. as for the soaked cigarettes – i’d see it as a sign to give up smoking 😉

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